I saw this for the first time yesterday when posted on Facebook by Deb Burgard, a psychologist and eating disorders expert. I've heard Deb say it before: "Nothing about us without us" and I recognized the phrase from other movements I've been involved with throughout the years. But when I really thought about it and looked carefully at the chart, I had an angry moment that despite all of my work with BEDA, I have not felt in some time.
I've been pretty open about my own struggles, but I have to say that seeing this graph made me realize that I have pushed the feelings I've had about being mistreated, underestimated, bullied, and laughed at throughout my life because of my weight way below the surface.
In high school, my best friend called me a nickname that was very much like Shamoo the Whale. Yes, this is right...my BFF. How humiliating and demeaning. I buried it way down somewhere and laughed it off. After all, I wanted to be liked. To stick up for myself would have meant loosing an entire group of friends (or so I thought).
So are the collective overweight/obese population currently represented in the national conversation to eliminate obesity? Is their own plight to be happy, healthy, functioning individuals recognized? No, according to this chart, which comes directly from the list of individuals/groups invited to the White House to advise on the "Let's Move" initiative.
Why not? Do we not deserve a voice? Doesn't it benefit any effort to listen to the people affected? Would we attack those with cancer and make decisions without them? I don't like comparing obesity with cancer, because I believe it is apples and oranges, but I'd like to have those making the decisions think about what it means to not listen to those they are trying to "fix."
The only eating disorder group in attendance at the meetings hosted by the White House was the National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA). Lynn Grefe, its CEO did a fine job representing our collective cause, but she is one person in a sea of medical groups and weight loss companies. The fact that BEDA was not invited nor any other group representing those who are fat is appaulling.
Perhaps its because the groups that DO represent fat people are considered out of the mainstream. Perhaps it is because there seems to be an angry approach by the organizations that are out there advocating for civil rights for fat people.
I'm not sure if there is another way considering that obesity community does not want to really listen to what the fat advocates are saying. There is a middle ground and there is a common sense approach, but neither side wants to part with their extremes.
BEDA's approach is to work within all stakeholder organizations in order to act as a bridge. We hope we can teach acceptance and encourage an effort to do no harm. We think the concerns of fat people and those with eating disorders are VERY relevant to the current conversation. We are making in roads, but it is slow and sometimes frustrating.
We all need to begin to listen carefully as we will then surely hear the answers. I imagine hearing the following:
I want to be respected, liked, loved and part of a community.
I want to feel better about myself RIGHT NOW, not 5 pounds from now.
I want my physician to treat me without judgement so that I feel comfortable turning to him/her about health issues.
I want to engage in movement without feeling that others are watching and judging me.
I want the assumption to be made that I am smart, and productive based on my contributions and actions--not my size.
I want to be talked about for how I treat others and what I have to contribute, not for my size or shape.
I want to follow my dreams and not be limited by what others believe I can and can't do based on my body size.
I want to be chosen as a friend, love interest, teammate, colleague, or partner because I am human and have the right to be happy.
I want to live life without the fear of violence against me because of my size.- I want to be happy.
No comments:
Post a Comment